“Don’t ask what the world needs.

Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it.

Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”

- Howard Thurman

What if the exact thing that will make you feel free, the thing that will make you feel most alive is the thing that will hurt someone the most?

I need to (as trite as this sounds) find who I am. Who is Jordan Virden? Over the years I have lost a piece of myself it wasn't obvious at first, but as sure as a dam breaks and water rushes through, it became extremely apparent. It is hard to describe because I know simple likes and dislikes but am a complete stranger to myself on deeper things, things that shape one into who they are supposed to be. While I am not entirely sure how to go about figuring this out, I know I am doing the right thing by at least attempting it. I'm at peace with the decisions that I have made and although I hate hurting anyone, I know it is absolutely necessary.

As for now, this singular way of life is for the best. I need to take a step back and explore who I am and who I want to be. Although it may be lonely this way, I'll take a few lonely nights to not having the freedom to figure out and understand who I am. In the future, how can I love someone else and appreciate them for who they are if I don't even know myself? In order to be with someone and love them completely for who they are you must first love and know yourself. You cannot give someone something that you yourself do not posses.

It's a hard road but it's for the best.

love love.

Jordan